For some Illinois parents, getting a divorce can mean worrying about the impact of this change on their children. Fortunately, there are several things that they can do to make this time less challenging.
What parents can do
Children often have a tendency to worry that a divorce is their fault, and parents should take pains to reassure them that this is not the case. While being open to discussing the divorce is important, this should be done in an age-appropriate way. Children do not need details about parental conflict, custody agreements or court documents.
Parents may have the most success in helping their children adjust if they focus on what is best for their kids. Whatever their disagreements with the other parent, they can avoid negative remarks about them in front of the children. Parents may also want to pick their battles. Which parent pays for certain extracurricular activities may not be included in the child custody or divorce agreement, but a parent who can afford it might want to worry more about what is best for the child than what arrangement is fairest to them. Ideally, parents can work out these and other issues between themselves instead of turning to litigation to solve them.
Helping kids adjust
Prioritizing a sense of stability for the child and trying to minimize disruption to their daily life can also help with adjustment. In general, children need to know that they are cared for regardless of what has happened in the relationship between their parents.
Children can adjust to a divorce with the help of the parents. Cooperation with the other parent is not always possible in a divorce, but if this is the case, a mother or father can still take steps to act in the best interests of their child.